¿Qué dirán?

"And don´t think that because we´re in the United States you have permission to behave like those americanas," Mami warned.

"Those americanas" were any female my age who were not nenas puertorriqueñas decentes. Decent Puerto Rican girls did not wear pants unless they were riding horses, did not wear makeup, did not tease their hair....

A nena puertorriqueña decente listened to her mother, learned to cook and keep a neat house, left her room when a man visiting her grandmother looked too much to her direction, sat with her legs togeteher even when she was alone minding her own business and reading a book. The person a nena decente had to avoid the most el hombre que le hizo el daño-the man who took her virginity of a friend, neighbor, or relative without first marrying her. El daño-the damage-spoiles it for rightful "owner" of her virginity, a legitimate husband in a monogamous relationship.

A nena puertorriqueña dencente didnot give the neighbors cause to gossip. This meant she was counscious at all times of lo que dirá la gente, what people would say, and take that into account when weighing her actions, otherwise ¿qué dirán?

Americanas had too much freedom to do as they pleased, wich they abused by being sexually available to any pendejo who looked their way. Americanas were also disrespectful of their elders, contemptuous of family, lazy housekeepers dependent on prepared food, and, in spite of their sexual freedom, did not know how to please a man. They also seemed not to care what anyone thought about their behavior, as if el qué dirán did not exist in English.

I noticed some contradictions.

Mami, a mujer decente, had never married Papi and I had never seen her in church. ¿Qué dirán? Mami dressed to accentuate an hourglass figure crowned by luxurious black hair that, in New york, she cut and learned to dye in shades of brown, blonde, and even red. ¿Qué dirán? She curled, teased, and sprayed her hair if she had to leave our apartment. She girdled her abdomen to look as if she had not had birthed seven children. When she walked down the street in her high heels, her hips swung voluptuously, ¿qué dirán?....

Six months after we came to New York, Mami fell in love with Francisco, and by our first summer in Brooklyn, he was living with us in defiance of Tata, who did not think it was appropiate for Mami to "bring a strange man into a house with teenegers girls." ¿Qué dirán? Don Julio, Tata´s boyfriend, was exempt from this rule.

The Turkish Lover by Esmeralda Santiago